HEAL.ME

When I choose to feel goodness above evil

When my brain no longer saves up pain

Stored away in the depths of hurt and weakened pieces of tattered ghost-soul

And I listen to what my body needs from me

And I satisfy it with caring…

When you feel like you want to cry when you feel good

Because you are so used to touching fire

And walking on hot coals

It hurts more to feel love from another

Because the happiness aches inside you…

When you want to fold-up into a ball and be fetal and safe

Even though you want to love back

And love yourself enough to accept it

But the overwhelming feeling that you don’t deserve it sneaks up to you

And pushes you down like a boy in the schoolyard

When all you wanted to do was play…

That’s how it feels to love myself.

J.F

heart shaped red neon signage
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DEAR.DAD,

DEAR.DAD,

The water lilies of Monet’s paintings

Are small in comparison to

the love I have for

my father.

You had that love too with

my grandfather

and it lives on

in the Adriatic waves.

Sail away but not too far

always come back to shore

as we all wait

to greet you.

Always know

in your deepest of heart

we are not a family

without you.

LOVE,

JOANNA

two boat on ocean during golden time
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