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PUNK.GUILT

Her love is her punk guilt — his dishonesty is his perverse pride.

Pretty pink lady

You rescue him like an angel above

But you know deep down you can’t save him

From the dark side of his love.

Punk guilt and sexy shame

For the dirty little things you do

Won’t stop his mind from wandering

Was his loyalty ever true?

So you find yourself in heart’s heaven

Or hellish purgatory of the mind

Within you lies a longing

Your punk heart may never find.

J.F

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DARK.LIGHT

Can you see her in red? She sees red in your dark light. Evil prevails, but adds fuel to Good’s fire.

What is this feverish pitch?

A high-power flute in the ear

Come near me and we will weep together

But don’t come back —

My heart can’t squeeze any tighter

My gut pain hasn’t subsided

You are not my dark light

You are figments of bright evil

You are darkness at best and charlatan fallen-angel at worst

Curse you —

You’ve too vile a smile

A smirk

Work to keep your lady in red

Or rot in nothingness —

Don’t taint my mind with poison

Dark light was the mental illness, not the cure to lonesomeness.

J.F

 

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THE.GIFT

Her love, her faith; she gives herself the gift.

Christmas holds the gift

For years before she could not feel it

Lost in the snowy haze

Of her mind, she could not see it.

Selfish and contrived

Never by choice, but by sculpted faith

Or lack thereof, she wandered

Distracted from her place.

Here she has a home

With or without her knight

It’s more than she could bear

Her tears of joy followed by the sight —

Of a wish to have her heart

All to herself again

It may be in his hands —

Though, with love of self, she wins.

J.F

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ONLY.ONCE

I hope you let me be your light this time — I promise only once.

Only once, I want to lift your spirits

Bring you back to life with the setting sun

He sleeps, but as night falls, she is awaken

The moon dances light on your face, only once.

Only once, take my hand and let me carry you

I am not weak, but a resilient force to take you back —

To a time when you felt safe and sound

And I will travel time for you, only once.

Only once, do I dare touch your hair

Push it back on your face and wipe your tears

There is no room for fear here

You will love me this time, even if it’s only once.

J.F

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SHE.WHISPERS

Out of her mouth she whispers words only for her to hear.

She whispers, soft at first

As the night chill enters her room

She grows louder

A semi-silent flight.

Sailing through time, bottled up

No longer able to hold back

It is her captivating smile

Bringing her might.

Never again will she be tied down

Drowning in gold and silver

Liquid to the touch

But so solid she can’t escape.

Her mind is her fortress

Asking for help from mothers before her

Carrying herself to freedom

Her life is her own to create.

J.F

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WITH.ME

My new self sings to my old self and my spirit lifts with me.

Her voice lifts

The sound of her singing echos

She stands tall

And carries herself through the pain.

Over time

She forgets her troubles

And realizes

She is sane.

It may be small

A fleeting moment

But with me

I have my old self.

And her voice carries out the tune

Of old and new memories

She is not forgotten

She is with me —

I am my own muse.

J.F

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SET.FREE

Finally, I have come to know what a wild horse feels as she is set free.

Overly cautious, I used to be the one

Who stayed inside her head, never speaking up

Or speaking out

For what I strongly believed in.

Then you opened the door, I crawled through it

Held back for so long by the leash, I was foolish

Finally I let you

Show me the way.

My eyes and heart swing wide around, an orbiting

Soul-star, helium carrying me higher

And higher

I’m lit by your fire.

Undone ribbons are all that is left of the past life

I lived, tied up before but I still forgive

You of the damage done

Now he carries my Sun.

J.F

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NOTHING.ELSE

I don’t want him — I want her.
And nothing else matters.

Closely watching her movements

Rickashaying against the curtain are her shadows

Lamplight softening the harsh dark silhouette

Telling tales of her waking up in meadows.

For me, nothing else matters

Except the gleam of the light in her eyes

Showing how brightly her words swirl

Through inner workings of her mind.

I changed my mind

I don’t want him — I want her

Nothing else matters:

Cat caught ladybird.

J.F